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Saturday, June 25, 2011

One more step.

Making it law is a step towards acceptance. Sadly I suspect that peoples phobias are being challenged with the state of New York signing into law… That two people of the same sex can be legally recognized in a partnership of marriage.

Once upon a time two people living together challenged the moral fabric. If they were not of the same sex. Now we see the challenge yet again. The moral chest pounding group that wants to impose it’s viewpoints is having to deal with the fact that two people of the same sex can be legally married. Where the hell were those chest pounding moralists when those two same people were merely living together out of wedlock??? Can’t have it both ways chum. I stand by what I said earlier…

Like it or not. There are ‘people’ that love each other. They commit to one another. It is not about special rights. It’s about two ‘people’ making a commitment of devotion. It is not about servitude of one to the other it is about a partnership of the heart. Now what is wrong with that? Two ‘people’ who share in a partnership of the heart should be admired. Admired and recognized as two ‘people’ in love.

This morning while out and about I saw two people. They were older then I. One was having difficulty walking and the other person was assisting in a very kind way. It was fairly clear to me that they were together. At one point they noticed I was looking in their direction. They stopped touching each other. They stepped apart. As I got closer I raised my right hand and made a fist and said “NEW YORK!” They both smiled. The relief across their face was up lifting and heartbreaking all at once.

What kind of ridicule and sadistic tortures have they faced for being two people that cared for one another? Yet seeing the simplicity of two caring was great, it also bothered me that they felt inclined to pull away from one another.

We are a long way from being collectively a compassionate group that is merely here on loan. We should recall that at any moment our existence is subject to something much greater then anybody has ever been able to explain.

Hatred for others happiness is nothing more than jealousy. I find no solace in jealousy. I often find joy in just knowing that others have moved passed jealousy and to escape the trappings of hatred to know and find peace. This brings me back to the beginning.

Signing same sex marriage into law is a step. Yet the road ahead is much further. Sadly the hatred and disgust that will be displayed over the next many days, months and years… Is on one hand not the fault of those raised in a society that still finds joy in having scapegoats.

It is training if you will. If ones instincts is to be compassionate then the seed was planted and from that seed a garden can still bloom. If one truly wants to escape from an exisistence of fear and hatred all one has to do is be willing. I have yet to meet anybody who wants to live in misery. Not once they have tasted the sweetness of joy, only to find that the serving of misery was foul and reeked of bile.

Acceptance is a step, laws are a step into acceptance the legacy we leave is our gift. The idea of a legacy of hate and ridicule is that what one wants to be known for? I think not. The challenge is yours and yours alone.

I have had the gift of being able to recognize the gift of life for what it is. I truly hope that we can all share it with one another. I am not an educated person. However I am a person. You are as well. That is what I see and look for… Nothing else. If these words cause thought, then that is all I can ever hope for.

Admire those who are of a compassionate nature. Nurture those that seek it. Leave the judgment of those hating at the door step. But never be a doormat for anybody. Never give up yourself, to please those that terrify you. With that being said I thank those that have been fighting for their right to express love. The true warriors between good and evil. You have my eternal gratitude.

Chris…









©2011
All rights reserved
Chris J Hutchins
Dog Hair Productions









Thursday, June 16, 2011

Here we are in 2011, not 1911.

As I listen to the forever arguments about Seattle and its transportation problems. I have gotten to this point and have some questions.

Cheap oil is never coming back and the destruction of public transportation took place long ago, at a time nobody worried about it. Here we are in 2011, not 1911. We all have a responsibility to leave a functioning city for the future. At the current rate of elongated debates and division between car and mass transit, we simply keep passing the debate to the next generation. I grew up here in the Puget Sound area; about ten miles outside of the city of Seattle to be more precise. So to say I have been hearing this debate since childhood is accurate.

Yes, I am for the recall of the current mayor for various reasons but this about solutions, not just a rant against the failings of a public servant.

I have looked at and heard about the surface option as opposed to the tunnel. What goes through my mind is this: why does there seems to be only one option? That is the basic problem. I see both the tunnel and the surface improvements as an option. A tunnel, along with surface improvements for a better traffic flow. Seems that it would offer viable choices. It would be a huge civic improvement for the city and a win, win for both sides of the argument. The “city” needs to create jobs. Jobs are good for the economy. The city is not creating jobs. (Excluding the political payback jobs the mayor created.) This idea that both can’t be done is mind-boggling.

The surface improvement would mean some long term jobs creation and also offer the option, if needed for instance, when there is trouble in the tunnel due to breakdowns etc. For the city to simply ignore the surface option is akin to a child saying I want it my way or I’m going home. A very selfish way of dealing with the problems we are going to face with just a tunnel and no surface overhaul.

It is clear that the surface option as it currently sits is in need of improvements. With those improvements, there would obviously be a maintenance program that would continue after completion… Uh??? Hello…jobs, jobs creation, long-term jobs that feed the economy. Spending money to make money; it is a reality in economics that seems to work. I think the big wheels call it investing; investment for the future.

Does anybody remember the I-5 project in 2007??? They were able to get that job done in record time. The city did not come to a standstill. Incentives to the contractors to get the job done under schedule and under budget; again, win/win. Let the state dig their tunnel. Let the city rise to the occasion for civic improvements by creating jobs that boost the local economy. That is the kind of political leadership we are looking for. Why are the politicians not getting the big picture? As a politician, I would think one would want to be remembered for the overall long-term improvement of the city.

The car is not going away. As I write this, the electric car is getting closer and closer to a reality that will take over the internal combustion car. The city has recharging stations! In other words, the city government is supporting the use of a private car. The private mode of transportation is simply not going away. Lets break it down one more time: the city has recharging stations for electric cars. The private car is not going away. I think that my fantasy/dream vision of the city is far more attainable then the narrow vision of a utopian mass transit/bicycling/walking city. Hence the need for surface improvements to go along with, rather than instead of, the tunnel.

Sincerely a concerned citizen of the city of Seattle.

Chris J Hutchins



© 2011
All rights reserved
Chris J Hutchins
Dog Hair Productions

Sunday, June 5, 2011

Done.

Here it is: I’m tired. Tired of multiple inputs as to how I should feel. Tired of being told by those who have not walked a single step in my shoes yet have the audacity to presume they know what is best. Don’t feel anger…don’t feel resentment. Let it go. Forgive those who betrayed you.

Those who attempt to guilt me into thinking I let them down. Those who I stood for, time and time again, with praise and monetary rewards. Those who call and ask for me. Where are you when I need you? Where are you? You are off on your trip doing what you need to do, despite any plea from the likes of me.

Excuses followed by excuses are certainly no foundation for you to stand on when asking me yet again to bail you out. I ask and get nothing. You ask and give nothing but the bile of your disappointments when I say no. Then I am told how to feel.

I have spent most of my life in the position of being minimized by those whose arrogance seems somehow justified. Your role is more important and somehow smarter than anything I could have or ever did. You ask me why I seem so down and then tell me to “get over it”, yet offer nothing. Nothing but cheap lip service words that may have been read from some tabloid article about how to feel better. You use those words to condescend and minimize anything I might be feeling.

You ask who I am. Well, I am a reflection of the crap that has been presented. I am a reflection of the good that has been presented. If I speak of the good with enthusiasm, some attempt to challenge my sexuality with bad jokes about who I am. I have no time any further for those that act or live that way.

I have no more time to be with those who live under a sarcastic umbrella of ridicule. The umbrella that gives shelter from light. Shelter from the light that scares most. They spread their darkness with temporary delight until the next victim is in sight. I loathe you. You, with your manipulation of guilt and remorse. I loathe you who attempt to tell me how to feel. You know NOTHING about who I am. You never will and my armor all though is thick; it is there for the ones who attack and swim in orgasmic glee in the pool of blood drawn from me. May you drown in it. I will not allow you to be reborn in it.

Don’t tell me how I feel. Don’t tell me how I should feel. Ever. You do not have the right. Don’t tell me anything that you can’t back up. From the cradle I have heard how I should be; closed inside parameters that kept me stifled and locked away in an unattainable place. I blame nobody. But now I am at the place where I am get to say… FUCK OFF! No longer listening to the shallow lip service of those who spend their time keeping up appearances. Either put up or shut up. Stop asking of me and then running off to the next possible trend that will give you your insatiable need for failure. You can save your hollow praise. I am no longer the doormat. You are no longer something that is worth my praise. You showed your true colors.



Another thing…take your stereotypes and SHOVE them where someone else might want them. I have no further patience for the homophobes, bigots or racists of any kind. All the hate in that mindset can go to the hell of their making. The hell of the fantastical book of dreams and fantasy.

I’m tired. I’m tired. I’m tired. That is it. No plea for attention. No shallow congratulations, please. I’m tired of talk. Now I will walk away from the ones that have nothing other than words they stole from another book.

Chris…







©2011
All rights reserved
Chris J Hutchins
Dog Hair Productions







Friday, June 3, 2011

Time goes by at the same speed each day.

Time goes by at the same speed each day. Despite the idea or notion that it goes by faster as we get older. Here is one idea that is floating around, as to how this idea that time goes by faster with each passing decade…

As a child there is only a few years worth of life experience to look back on. Only natural to be looking ahead. Looking ahead to a blank canvas. For some that blank canvas can be rather overwhelming. It seems so far away. I think due to the fact the there is no actual scale to measure the time line with.

As life progress’s we start to pick up a variety of paints so to speak. To start coloring the canvas if you will. Like the canvas as our memory banks begin to fill up with pictures, or experiences if you will. We start to be able to look back. Looking back at say the age of fifteen you have some foundations already put down. And yet still have what appears to be a vast ocean of time to navigate. Much like today. The difference is as we grow older we have a larger tool (tool meaning more of a history to look back on) to measure the distance with. We start thinking my it has gone by so fast.

Myself at 15 years had already began to understand the concept that this thing called time, can zip right by you if not paying attention. Nothing out of the ordinary. I suppose that as children looking forward it is a perfectly natural mode to be in.

Of course as each decade passes by there is more experience that can be looked at and the closer one is getting to the end. Maybe that is why some impatience or frustration about the idea that time seems to have sped up. Has it? Well of course not. But as we approach what seems to be an end we tend to think we are running out of time. It is a logical conclusion.

How many remember how time seems to stand still as a young child? In m case the gift or curse depending on ones point of view, is I have a strange ability for recall. ( Certainly would have been beneficial in the structure of school, that is another subject all together.) I remember the notion of having to be in one place doing nothing for a hour seemed an eternity. Now days a hour is simply not enough time for many of the mundane tasks. It whisks by. Whisks mind you, as I think of other things that are coming up. Mixed with the blurred pools of memory… As dishes rattle in the sink. I hear my childhood echoes of parental bickering. Whilst thinking of that letter I need to get into the post office before they close. All the while missing the actual moment of the simplicity of cleaning the dishes that nurtured. All of that being said what happened. I missed it, I was to distracted in yesterday and the possible tomorrow possible meaning one never actually knows when the end is there. Well in most cases one never actually knows exactly when.

Think of this for a moment… As a child the really fun stuff went by too fast, and now that I have aged and been lucky enough to continue aging. It is seemingly going by fast because it so much Zippity Do Dah fun? One could surmise that I suppose. Or perhaps it is based on an overwhelming feeling of wanting to do everything before the opportunity is taken away?

The longer we continue the more paints we add to the canvas. The more the canvas is filling up. Turpentine may remove paint but it will not remove the brush stroke that took place however many years before. The brush stroke still happened , it is only the hue of the paint that was removed.

In other words no such thing as a clean slate. The impact we make is there like it or not. In other words the pressure on the canvass still happened. The abrasion against the canvass is there, then to have the hue removed also removes some of the canvass. If our life is a canvass, some of life was wiped away as well. No matter how one may try to minimize that fact.

Who has not had a moment, or many moments where they wanted to have a clean slate to work with? That being asked I recall a time when I got new opportunity presented. It appeared to be a clean slate. Alas just like time moving fast or slow it was an illusion. The illusion was erased as the prior impacts I had made were presented to me in a variety of ways.

Not letting those prior acts dictate the direction I had chosen at a turning point that was the key. Time was certainly moving along and I had decided to start noticing the moment. As opposed to being bogged down by some past recollections/ actions. Or how about a past lesson?

A lesson something to refer to when looking ahead or simply dealing inside the moment. Something to refer to as the new steps of each new day was right in front of me. As for worry about the future… Not nearly as big of an issue these days. It (the future) shows up with each passing second. No stopping it. Better to acknowledge it for what it is when it is right there, like right now. It happens no sooner nor later then it ever did.

What is it I, or you are doing right now? That is an important thing to ponder, we already know that before has an impact on now. Most likely it will later on. How significant is yet to be discovered.

Are the brush strokes broad and messy, or are they precise and to the point? The general broad strokes of yesterday have been cleaned up in some sense, as in writing one needs to be thoughtful in their words just like painting your picture, be careful in your choices. Less turpentine will be needed later. As mentioned above the turpentine will also have an effect that could weaken the canvas.

Time is moving at one second at a time. No faster no slower it just keeps on moving along. Or is it that time has stood still and it is… We that have been moving along?


Time moves slowly when always looking ahead, and ignoring the moment. It moves just as slowly when always looking back. An old saying, old meaning I heard it years ago…

“If you got one foot in yesterday, and one foot in tomorrow. You are pissing all over today.” Now how fast is time moving for you?

I hope that this causes questions or at the very least a smile. None the less it has been a notion that crossed my mind repeatedly and I thought worthy of sharing.

Chris…


















©2011
All rights reserved
Chris J Hutchins
Dog Hair Productions